Personal Development: Seven Principles of Hermeticism

A beach wtih clear and blue water. people swimming, a boat, and a person walking in the waves on shore.

Personal Development is a long term process of becoming a better person than you were the day before. It takes a lifetime of work, practice, dedication, and growth. Working on oneself isn’t easy. It takes a strong and determined person to overcome fears, difficulties, and live a happy life. Even when you feel like you failed you still need the strength and perseverance to keep going.

I once took a course at Landmark. They told me “There is nothing wrong with you, shit is just in the way.” That stuck with me. We are all perfect beings with crap in the way. Personal development is a way to get rid of that shit. Some people are so deep in their shit (ego) that they can’t see a way out. I find that when this is the case, it takes a lot of willpower and determination to dig deep and clean yourself of all the stuff holding you back. Some people prefer to sit in their stuff because it is easier or some other reason only they know. It is okay because not everyone is meant to evolve into a higher state of consciousness.

Seven Principles of Hermeticism

To understand this deeper, we need to understand the 7 principles of Hermeticism. I attended a school for Hermetic Philosophy for a few years. (I hope to return again soon.) The school opened my eyes to the beginning of why things are the way they are. I have so much more to learn, but what I have learned I want to share with you.

You can read about where Hermeticism started in The Kybalion. Not only does the book tell you the origin, but it also goes into detail the 7 Principles. It is a really good read.

I want to briefly take you through the 7 Principles of Hermeticism. Understanding these are the beginning. At least, they were for me. There are some principles that I understand more than others. I still don’t fully grasp any of them. To fully understand these principles takes time, experience, and comprehension. Since I am not a master, there is more to be understood and learned.

Principle One: Mentalism

“All is mind.” —The Kybalion.

Everything is mental, whether it is energy, power, or matter. It all begins in the mind. In order to master life, you have to master your mental state. Elevate your energy to a higher way of thinking. Everything that happens in your conscious and unconscious mind affects what is around you. This explains why some people have things and others do not. I know for me mentally, I do not attract wealth in terms of money because of my mental thoughts. The more I work towards transmuting my mental thoughts the more I receive in the areas I lack.

Principle Two: Correspondence

“As above, so below; as below, so above.”—The Kybalion.

This principle is one of the most important. It can help you understand that there are different levels of truth and that the Universe is grander than we imagine. There is an unknown part of life that we have yet to see. The principle of correspondence shows us that what is above, so below and what is below, so above. So what is here on earth, there is in another plane in the Universe.

What we do affects the other planes and vis versa. This is one of the principles that I struggle to understand deeply. It goes much deeper than my current understanding. And because I have such little understanding of this, I don’t want to elaborate more.

Principle Three: Vibration

“Nothing rests; everything moves; everything vibrates.”—The Kybalion.

Everything has vibrations, whether it be a low or high vibration. The universe vibrations, animals and things vibrate. Some at a higher level and some at a lower level. What we eat has a vibration, so when we consume food we take on that vibration. Same with smoking and drinking. Ever notice that after a night of drinking you feel low and depressed? That is because your vibration was lowered by the alcohol. There are people who are more sensitive to vibrations and energies than others. This allows some people to perceive how things feel more deeply.

There are certain foods I can not eat or need to eat in small quantities. There are certain places I can only go for short periods of time. Certain people who make me want to run the other way. Of course, there are higher vibrating people, places, and things as well. All of which I can be felt if the person is conscious of the energies around them

Principle Four: Polarity

“Everything is Dual; everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the same; opposites are identical in nature, but different in degree; extremes meet; all truths are but half‑truths; all paradoxes may be reconciled.”—The Kybalion.

The statement above describes polarity perfectly. Everything has an opposite. Death and Life. Happy and Sad. Up and Down. You can’t have one without the other. This allows us to see the truths. We couldn’t understand happiness without pain and sadness. We couldn’t understand love without hate. Life without Death.

Principle Five: Rhythm

“Everything flows, out and in; everything has its tides; all things rise and fall; the pendulum‑swing manifests in everything; the measure of the swing to the right is the measure of the swing to the left; rhythm compensates.”—The Kybalion.

The pendulum is always swinging from left to right. We can move up the pendulum so that we aren’t as affected by it’s sway. Eventually being above it, looking down not affected at all. Same with the changing of the tides. We could be in the ocean on a huge boat where we are less affected by the tides or a smaller boat being affected more. Eventually, being on the shore just watching the tides change.

When we move to the left, there is always a reaction to move us to the right. Same with the changing of the tides. Rhythm is always moving and ever-changing. Think of a woman’s monthly cycle. It is always moving from creating new to getting rid of the old. It is the rhythm of life.

Principle Six: Cause and Effect

“Every Cause has its Effect; every Effect has its Cause; everything happens according to Law; Chance is but a name for Law not 16 recognized; there are many planes of causation, but nothing escapes the Law.”—The Kybalion.

This is something we all learned in school. You do something and something happens. You throw a stone and the water moves. The cause is the stone being thrown. The effect is water moving. It happens in everything. You change your mindset and something pushes back on you. You do something good (expecting nothing in return) and something good comes back to you. What we do on this plane of existence, affects another plane of existence. The Universe is connected to all, so our energies around things affect the universe.

Principle Seven: Gender

“Gender is in everything; everything has its Masculine and Feminine Principles; Gender manifests on all planes.”—The Kybalion.

This is one of the principles that I don’t have a deep understanding of. I know that things have a feminine and masculine portion to them. I know that in the physical world it is what we call our “sex”. I know on other planes in the Universe it doesn’t have a form. That is really all I understand. So I don’t want to go into more detail.  

Hermetic Books

If you want to learn more, there are a few books written on hermeticism available today. You can also reach out to The Institute for Hermetic Philosophy. The Institute has schools in NYC, Chile, Venezuela, and Russia to name a few. The NYC branch has monthly seminars you can attend without becoming a member. If you are interested, I recommend attending the seminars and reading the books to make sure it is something for you.

If you are interested in reading more about Hermeticism, these are the top 3 books to read.

The Kybalion

The Secret Science

The Stellar Man

What to do on Rainy Days

It seems like October Weather in Costa Rica came a bit early this year. It has been raining PRETTY MUCH ALL DAY for 2 weeks. This normally doesn’t happen in May. Right now, we should be having rainy nights, not rain ALL DAY!

When it rains all day, you can’t go to the beach. Since most of what you can do is outdoors in Costa Rica, I had to find ways to keep myself busy while having fun indoors. I wanted to share this with you because these can happen during snow days, rainy days, or really any day you want to spend inside.

Play Cards

Since I collect cards, this is one of my favorite things to do on a rainy day. There are so many card games you could play. Here are my favorite games to play. Click on each

King’s Corners

Rummy

Crazy Eights

Egyptian Rat Screw

UNO with cards

Bake Something

I always get the craving for something sweet when it rains. I have a few go to recipes for desserts I use when it rains. Not only am I able to listen to music and make a mess, I get an amazing hot treat. Here are my top recipes.

PopTarts

I do make these a little differently than the recipe. I don’t actually make the rhubarb and strawberry compote. I just use strawberry jam. It comes out great and it’s a bit easier to do.

Brownies

Since I always have nesquick chocolate powder mix for hot chocolate. It’s simple and so delicious!

Peanut Butter Cookies

I have been making these since I was a kid. They are simple, easy, and soooo good!

Read a Book

I am sure there is a book you have always wanted to read. Why not take a rainy day to knock that book off your list? Curl up on the couch or in your bed with a cup of tea or hot chocolate, and enjoy a good book. I have a list of books that you could choose from if you need some help.

JUST DANCE!

Just DANCE! Even if you don’t have an Xbox, you can still enjoy a great workout and fun time doing just dance. I use these in my classroom for rainy days. The kids and I both love it. Head to youtube and find a song that moves you! Here’s a list of my favorites.

Timber

Starships

Dynamite

Animal

Where have you been

That Power

Other Ideas

There are so many things you can do at home on a rainy day. Draw and color a picture. Organize messy areas of your house. Paint. Have a deep conversation with a friend. Write a letter to someone special. Pillow fights. JUST HAVE FUN!

Learning a New Language

cloud forest bridge that says "Me encanta Costa Rica"

Yesterday, it hit me. I noticed how far I have come with learning Spanish. I called Jonathan because my messages weren’t going through. We had a good 5-minute conversation, IN SPANISH!! Also, I was able to tell a parent what I needed them to know IN SPANISH!

10 month ago, we couldn’t do that. I knew a few words in Spanish, but I had difficulty understanding him on the phone. I had no issues yesterday. IT WAS AMAZING!

I am just blown away with how much Spanish I know now.

When I moved here, I knew I would learn Spanish. I had doubts at how long that would take. I struggle with dyslexia and failed Spanish in High School. Being fluent in Spanish seemed like it would take many years. While I am not fluent, I am able to communicate what I need on a daily basis now.

I learned the most from being around Jonathan. Since we spend the most time together, it forced me to learn his language. At school and around town there are many people who speak English. This kept me from using Spanish more often.

For some people, taking Spanish lessons is the best way for them to learn a new language. For me, it is trial and error. Memorizing different types of words and phrases is monotonous. I am more of a visual person. Writing and reading different types of text helps me speak the language more.

I write and read text messages in Spanish to Jonathan daily. I watch Netflix with Spanish subtitles. Lastly, I read menus and paperwork at school. I am able to visually see the words in my head before speaking.

There is still a lot of learning to do with vocabulary and grammar. I am learning new vocabulary every day. Yesterday, I learned what dragonfly was, libélula and tell him, dile. My Spanish is not grammatically correct and I am okay with that. I am still learning. The most important thing is practice even if it is not always correct or perfect.

Learning a new language is difficult, but it can be done. Allow yourself to breathe. Figure out how you learn best. Some learn best in classes and some learn best by trial and error. Give yourself love and celebrate the achievements you make, even if it is a small one.

Being an Empath and a Woman

Being a Woman

Being a woman and an Empath is hard. There are so many things that affect us in ways that some people can’t imagine. We have a monthly cycle that changes every month. One month you are fine and perfect, the next you are an emotional wreck about to break. You feel like the world is going to end. Or you feel like the world is yours to own.

There is no stopping it because it’s there. It’s who we are as women. We have the ability to create life and this comes with emotional and hormonal changes that we need. We have this ability to feel and understand emotions. It is a hard job. We are the creators of life that is why there is a Woman’s Day. A day to celebrate the beauty, depth, and amazement of a woman.

Being an Empath

We feel everything deeply. We sense peoples energies and emotions as our own. We go so deep that we may not know if it is us or the world. We want to hide when the energies around us overwhelm us. Life seems so big that we question what it is. We have to question life. We have to question emotions, feeling, and energies.

An empath has to take time to be alone to process what they are feeling inside. It is not an easy life to live not knowing if what they feel is them or the outside world.

An Empath Woman

Now, put those two things together and you get crazy. Inside we feel crazy. Like there is something seriously wrong with us. We don’t understand why we feel the weight of the world on our shoulders.

If they both fall at the same time of the month, you can have an explosion of energy and depth. Sometimes too deep for us to handle. It makes you wonder… why do we have so much power that we can’t handle?

We create life and we also feel all the life we create. That can be overwhelming to any person. Woman are made to handle this depth that is why we can go through so much pain during child birth. We are strong, resilient, and loving. We have the power to create something so profound and deep within our bodies, not just physically, but spiritually as well. It is all about learning how to be with the depth and profound within us.

Blessing or Curse

People want to say it is a blessing and a curse. The only way to see it is as a blessing. We may lose friends and have people who don’t understand us, but we have a depth so deep that only few can comprehend. That is a blessing because you won’t find fake, lazy, or shallow people lasting long in our life. We may be alone and we may feel unheard. And IT IS OKAY because we have ourselves. As an Empath, having yourself is the most important thing.

There are many people who lose themselves in search of what we were born with. We are clear on what our path is. We are clear on what our life means to us whether people understand or not. People call us UNSTOPPABLE because nothing can stop us from finding the real, the truth, and the deep.

Being an Empath and a Woman is tough and it is well worth it because you feel and see what no one else can. Breathe through the hard times. Believe during deep times. Be you all the time.

A New Type of Planner

I love planning everything from weddings to my daily life. It is fun and exciting. All my friends know when we go on a trip. I am a planner. I can set up car rentals to hotels and everything in between. I planned every detail of my first wedding, from the budget to the name tags on the table. This is a new type of planner that can help you find your inner superwoman. It is a self-love guide.

How do I do it?

I use a daily planner. First, I write a list of things I need to do. Then I put them on the days they need to be done and cross them out as I complete them. I read and evaluate my planner every day. I add things when needed and I complete things every day that I have something to complete.

What does this do?

This allows you to make sure that you get things done when they need to be done. It keeps you from procrastinating because you schedule out when you need things done. For example, if I know that I have a meeting on Wednesday during my planning time, I can change the planning time for a day earlier. I am able to see things that I have in a week or a month. It is a great way to stay on top of things. You can find self-love in this as well.

Why I created this planner?

I am all about helping people learning how to become their inner superwoman (or superman). That is why I have the blog. A few months ago, I was thinking of ways that I could better provide information and activities for you to become your higher self. From that, came the planner.

I wanted to give you information and activities that I do on a daily basis or often. In the last 7 years, I have gained myself and became more independent and strong. All the activities I put in the planner are things I have done and learned from.

How to use the planner

First, decide how you want to create a planner. Since it is a PDF you can print the pages you want when you want them. To get the most out of the planner, I recommend sending the PDF to office depot or someplace similar and have it made into a book.

Second, write all your daily activities, events, and things to do in the planner. Look ahead in the planner and plan out some of the activities you need to do ahead of time.

Third, get to work. Do the activities, feel yourself, and answer the questions. It is a year-long process so take your time and give yourself love throughout the year. Allow yourself to feel and be with the emotions and feelings that arise. Even if it gets difficult, KEEP GOING!

Fourth, repeat the second step daily or weekly.

Lastly, tell me what you think. Either leave a comment or contact me. I would love to know what you think and how the planner is working for you. If there are things I can do to make it better, I want to know.

My wish

I wish that you find yourself in some way big or small during the year. I have had great success learning about myself with the activities, I want the same for you. FIND YOUR INNER SUPERWOMAN (or SUPERMAN).

Get your copy now! The FINDING YOUR INNER SUPERWOMAN planner is 50% off until August 1, 2019.

Free Will or Fate

** Spoiler alert! if you haven’t seen the movie don’t read any further**

Ever wonder why certain things happen in life. You meet people who you have an amazing connection with, but nothing happens? It feels as though something keeps you apart time after time. You feel helpless because there is nothing you can do about it. It is like the universe keeps putting obstacles in your way so you can be friends or lovers.

I recently watched The Adjustment Bureau, and it made me think.

Does this really happen in life? Are their people you are destined to be with at one point in your life: then the story changes and you aren’t together anymore, but the connection is there?

About the movie

Matt Damon, the actor that plays the lead character, meets this girl in the bathroom before he gives a speech. They instantly feel a connection. He thinks about her all the time. Damon gets her number and plans to call her. The “adjustment bureau” takes the number away saying he can never see her again.

He ignores this and takes the same bus every day for 3 years, hoping he would run into her again. Out of luck, they meet again. This time he doesn’t want to lose her. He knows that the bureau is out to keep them apart, and fights.

You find out that they were destined to be together in the past. The story changed and she was meant to marry someone else. The connection never ended. They still feel drawn to each other.

Matt Damon can’t deny the connection and does everything he can to fight the bureau. A bureau member helps him, and the girl breaks the story. They wind up living a good life together in the end.

Free Will or Fate

At the end of the movie, one of the men from the adjustment bureau states, “Most people live life on the path we set for them. Too afraid to explore any other. But once in a while people like you come along and knock down all the obstacles we put in your way. People who realize free will is a gift, you’ll never know how to use until you fight for it. I think that’s The Chairman’s real plan. And maybe, one day, we won’t write the plan. You will.”

If we fight hard enough to break the path set for us, can we really have a new plan? Does life really work that way? If there are people who are completely connected, can you really fight hard enough to be with them?

I ABSOLUTELY think this is true. I believe that if you are purely and deeply connected together with someone, you can fight to be with them. It won’t be easy because every obstacle will be put in the way of stopping it from happening.

Yet, it can be done.

That’s where the F*@# YES deeper comes in to play. You have to want it bad enough to change it. We have the power of free will, we don’t know how to use it because society and “the plan” tell us otherwise.

You will have to leave the comfortable.

Go against what you thought you knew,

Change your mindset and your way of living,

And MOST IMORTANTLY, you have to TRUST yourself.

Question life and don’t settle for mediocre.

If you want it, you have to make it happen. No one or thing should tell you that something isn’t real.

What if both people don’t fight?

This is the question I am still trying to figure out.

In the movie, Matt Damon fought with everything he had to make it happen. She didn’t. She also didn’t know what he knew. And in the end, they broke the story created for them and lived together.

It is a movie, and all the movies aren’t necessarily true. Is it possible? It is possible to change YOUR plan if YOU work for it. The other person has to work to change THEIR plan. We all have paths we CAN change with determination and growth. It doesn’t mean that the other person will fall into your new path. It is possible because ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.

Work on you and change your path. See where the new path takes you.  Become the superwoman or man you have always dreamed of becoming. Break free of the cycles and find your own fate. Life the life you choose and see who and where that finds you.

What is connection, anyway?

Connection is the energy between people. When we feel a connection to someone it is the strong similar energy we feel. Energy doesn’t lie. Energy doesn’t disappear. It does transform and becomes something new.

If you change your life, your energy changes. It can transform that connection you had with someone else in ways you never could imagine.

Learn and use your free will to transform the energy. It is there and it is worth fighting for.

Pura Vida: Living in Costa Rica Pros and Cons

I have been living in this wonderful country for two years now. I have come to understand the culture and way of life on a deep level. The way of life here is very PURA VIDA! Which is kind of like Hakuna Matata. It means no worries. Really… no worries.

These are some off the most friendly and grateful people I have ever met. If anything goes wrong, someone is there to help out, whether it is a flat tire or giving directions. The beaches are beautiful and a stunning sight to see, so everyone is happy. This is the beginning of the PURA VIDA lifestyle.

There are pros and cons to living in Costa Rica that I have figured out along the way.

Cons of Living in Costa Rica:

Little or no prevention.

People don’t fix things until after something happens. Every year during the rainy season, the dirt roads get washed away in some areas causing huge dips between the asphalt of the main road and the dirt road. If you have a low car, the bottom of your car hits the asphalt as you go over causing damage.

They are constantly dealing with flooding during storms. Instead of trying to solve the issues of flooding and PREVENT it from happening the best they can, they do nothing. We have deep trenches next to the roads that aren’t enough especially during the month of October. (in certain cases, there is no way to prevent flooding)

There are so many stray dogs in Costa Rica because people don’t castrate their dogs. They roam the streets and get pregnant. Near Heredia, there is a dog shelter with many acres and over a thousand dogs. I see puppies for adoption almost every day on Facebook. Rescue centers need donations because they don’t have the funds to pay for the treatments of the abandoned and hurt dogs. All could be prevented with the castration of their dogs. Nina and her brother were the results of one of those cases.

The Pura Vida lifestyle is a relaxed one so they don’t worry about the future and what could happen. They focus on the present and what’s important now. So, they put off what they could do today, for tomorrow.

Not always the most sufficient way of doing things.

When I got my work visa, they asked for a bunch of information that I thought was all. After 90 days of waiting, I got the news they needed more information. I could have been done my work visa in 90 days if they had given me all the information in the first place.

It was very similar to the motorcycle being taken away. They didn’t have the motorcycle in the system so we couldn’t schedule an appointment to pick it up.

They make certain situations harder than they should be.

People run late often.

If someone tells you they will be there in 15 minutes, it can equal 45 minutes. This can be because people just run late from taking their time getting ready. Other times it is because they are at the bank or another place similar that has a wait time of 1-3 hours. (seriously, I have waited at the bank for 2 hours before.) This comes with the PURA VIDA lifestyle, I will get there when I get their mindset.

Now, this doesn’t apply to everywhere. If you are going on tour, they tend to run on time as they know tourist doesn’t want to be late. They can lose customers and money by being late, so it doesn’t happen as often in the tourist industry.  

They always say YES even if they don’t mean it.

They will say “Let’s go jetskiing tomorrow. Meet me in Brasilito.” Tomorrow comes and no one shows up. It either happens because something else comes up or they don’t want to hurt your feelings. They are very people pleasing here which can be a good thing in certain situations and a bad thing in others.

Pros of Living in Costa Rica:

Calm, relaxed, and positive.

It really is one of the most relaxed places I have ever been too. People aren’t rushed to get places (hence being late often). People don’t get bothered by life as much. They will happily wait in line at the bank for two hours without getting upset. They close most of the government down for A WEEK at Christmas and Easter. The culture allows for plenty of time to be with family and relax.  

This calm and relaxed way of life allows them always to be smiling. And they always say “Hello, how are you?” (Hola, Como estas?) They talk like they have known you for years. You feel right at home, immediately.

They find different ways to do things.

The bus is not always reliable and the taxies are expensive. So, they created colectivos for people to get around easier in my town. These are unofficial (illegal) taxies. (There is one official taxi in Brasilito) The cost for me to get to work is 500 colones (less than a dollar) one way. They are on the corner or driving by and run pretty much all the time during the day. They are more reliable than the bus and cheaper than a taxi. The drivers have a WhatsApp group they use to communicate when and where the police are present so no one gets in trouble.

This allows for two things to happen. The drivers make money to support their families and the people get to work quicker and more efficient than the buses.

I have seen how they create an easier way of doing things if they don’t have the money to fix something. Sometimes it is not necessarily safe… but they do what they need. I once saw a lady driving around with her gas in a plastic milk carton on the top of her car with a tube going directly to the engine.

They enjoy nature.

Pura Vida is derived from (what I think) nature. Most people are the happiest when they are outside enjoying a nice bike ride, a walk in the park, or the beach. I think this is due to the amount of Vitamin D they get. And here in Costa Rica, they get A LOT of it.

People and kids are rarely inside. On the weekends, they pack a massive pot of food, a blowup mattress, and head to the beach. They will stay on the beach all day long. During the week, you always see kids playing at the local playground or town square.

There is always time for everything.

They tend not to be as materialistic here. So they have more time to do the things they enjoy. (This isn’t always the case.) The Ticos don’t want to have the next iPhone or the next new video game. They are content with playing soccer, going to the beach, and spending time with family. Family is a huge thing here so they will do what they can to support the family.

They will always help you out, even if it means being late to an appointment. Back when people could drive on Brasilito Beach, people used to get stuck in the river. EVERY TIME, a handful or more of people would be there to help get the car unstuck. It was always a community effort to make it happen.

Our Planet: Real or CGI?

What it’s about?

I recently watched the Netflix Documentary, Our Planet. It was very informative and spectacular. I learned some things about the planet I didn’t know before. It was definitely well done. They spoke about every part of Our Planet, from the depths of the ocean to the driest of deserts. The documentary talked about the ways we affect different species of animals and the environments in which they live.

Some of the animals are losing their habit due to overfishing and global warming. Since the waters are warmer the glaciers are melting at a faster rate. Since it is hotter periods of rain are not happening as often as they need in certain areas of the world, causing animals to not have access to fresh water. Sharks are being hunted to make shark fin soup. Our biodiversity is not what it used to be.

Is it too real to be true?

As I watched the documentary, I thought to myself… THIS SEEMS TOO PERFECT! So, I googled “Our planet Real.” There are hundreds of articles questioning whether it was real or not. Netflix says “It took four years, planning, and perfect timing to make it happen.”

They had video of fish up close and personal. How did they get that close without scaring the fish away? How did they get a group of dolphins swimming in such a huge pod and they the different shots they had? I would understand if they had one position from above, but how did they get it from below, above, and up close without disrupting the animals in action?

They had a Siberian Tiger. Many shots of the Tiger. They said, “it is a rare occurrence to see them in the wild.” If this is true how did they get such perfect video? I know some of the shots of the Tiger were probably done with hidden cameras, but what are the odds they got that amazing perfect shot? They had a leopard as well. Its coat was so perfect, it looked unreal.

The birds are so up close how did they not fly away?

Can we believe what they say?

It is Netflix we are talking about. They are a big name corporation (that I love), but if they admitted to using CGI, would people trust their documentary? Do you think they would actually tell the truth about whether or no they used CGI, even if it is for one or two small portions?

I would still love the documentary even if it was part CGI. It is a beautiful way to show what Earth is like or could be like if we took care of it. It could be used as an inspiration for us to aspire too. I know, I would love to be on a boat and see a huge pod of dolphins a 100 strong rather than two or three dolphins.

My main point is, can we trust Netflix when they say; they didn’t use CGI at all? Can we just take their word for it? Where is the proof?

In a world of fake news, can we believe everything we see?  Can we believe everything people say?

You can BE YOURSELF

Being yourself in a world full of people telling you how you should be is difficult. You have TV programs that give you an image that you need to find love or success. You have commercials trying to sell you that cream to get rid of wrinkles or the perfect hair dye to cover up the gray hair. You have magazines giving you tips on how to find the perfect relationship. It can be overwhelming and frustrating to be yourself with all this information bombarding you all the time.

I am here to tell you it can be done. YOU CAN BE YOURSELF even in this materialistic world. I have been able to BE MYSELF even when the world tells me otherwise. It takes practice, self-discipline, and awareness to make it happen.

For the last 7 years, I have been digging deep within myself to let go of what the world tells me I need to be. I have been truly answering the tough (and easy) questions like who would I be if I never drank alcohol and who would I be if I never had children?

There have been so many questions that took me hours to years to answer honestly without the weight of the world. There are things I used to do that I thought I needed to do because everyone else around me was doing them. Dying my hair, getting married, drinking and partying, and having the most clothes to name a few.

Here is how I did it…

Making a List:

I wrote down all the questions I had. This allowed me to see and organize the different questions. Then I grouped the questions together and did research to find the answers. I started with reading personal development and spiritual books. When books didn’t provide the answers I attended workshops and events that promoted a different perspective.

Meditating:

Meditating was and is one of the main ways for me to find answers. Most of the information you want to know is already within you, you just have to quiet your mind to listen to the soul. Meditation allowed me to be within myself and not in the world. Meditation took place as breathing exercises, yoga, and body relaxation techniques. All of these allowed me to process what I was learning in books and workshops. It gave the power of thought back to me.

Limiting Media:

Limiting what you watch and listen too can have a huge affect on being able to be yourself. This can happen in many ways. Watching Netflix instead of TV so you don’t watch the commercials. Listening to Pandora Premium so you can go ad free. Not watching the news and choosing which articles you read online. Giving yourself a time limit on how much time you spend on social media and watching TV and movies.

Change your mindset:

Changing your mindset is the biggest and hardest thing for you to BE YOURSELF in this world. It has to be done. You have to go from I NEED the WORLD to I NEED ME! I have come to understand that I don’t like drinking, dying my hair, or having the most clothes. Those things don’t make me happy. Deep down, they give me a feeling of unease and neediness. I have given up many activities so I could feel content and elevated. They were things I did because everyone else does them. It wasn’t who I was or wanted to be. I learned that I can have fun and let go without drinking. Allowing me to be free to be myself. I will always have ME, every second and minute of the day for as long as I live. People and things are temporary. If I make myself the priority over people and things, it gives me a happier and more fulfilling life.

It CAN BE DONE!  I am proof. Living the life you truly want is possible. I encourage you to make a list, meditate, limit media, and change your mindset. Give yourself time, love, and patience. Find the people who live as you want and spend time with them. You are more important than anyone or thing in this world.

Dating in Costa Rica

Dating in Costa Rica, I have found to be complicated. There are specific criteria that I want in a man.

No lying, no cheating, spiritual understanding, personal depth, independent, and willing to work on themselves.

The level of spiritual understanding and depth in men here is limited. Don’t get me wrong there are some good men here. There are men that don’t lie or cheat are here, just hard to find. Jonathan never lied or cheater, but his spiritual and energetic understand is very low.

From my understanding, men with a higher educational background tend to be more highly evolved. They have some knowledge of higher thinking. I think it allows them to think outside the box and question things in their lives a lot easier than men with lower educational background.

Don’t get me wrong this seems like I am stereotyping the men here. I have talked to and dated a good diverse background of men here. There are probably some men that defy this fact, I just haven’t met them yet. Even locals have told me that if I want to find a guy that has more of an open mind than I need to find someone with higher education.

Cheating and lying happen at all levels. It can happen with doctors, tourist guides, or fishermen. It is just part of their culture for some reason I don’t understand. I have met quite a few men that don’t do this. There are just more that do than don’t.

Since I live in a tourist town, it is easier to find people who are here on vacation than people who live here permanently.  There are a lot of bars too, but I don’t drink. They aren’t my scene.

So, what does a girl do?

She uses tinder.

Tinder isn’t perfect because a lot of men want just sex, are on vacation, or live far away. It does allow me to see a few things.

  1. It allows me to be picky about who I talk to. I can easily stop talking to them if things don’t go the way I want. If I am not feeling a conversation, I can just ignore them. If I like the conversation, I can keep it going and possibly meet them in person.
  2. I don’t have to see them if I don’t feel comfortable.
  3. Blocking a number is much easier than blocking a person. (which I have had trouble with in the past)
  4. With Tinder, you generally are talking to more than one person, which gives perspective on the different types of people. I have enjoyed seeing how the different guys are in terms of depth or neediness.

So far, I haven’t met anyone in person. I am not sure this will be the way I meet that perfect person I am looking for. It is worth a shot so I can understand more about the culture of the men here. I am open to what it may bring. Maybe it brings a travel buddy or a good friend. It is a learning process.